Oddments from the 21st Century

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Journal Entry 5121081919

This is the first entry. I never thought a journal would be necessary, but I am now no longer alone.

Everything changed today. I came across another functioning android. Her name is Clementine. She is 152 cm, seemingly designed to be a companion or light duty domestic servitor built to faithfully simulate a human. She seems to have been in storage since before the Change and only came online less than thirty-two hours ago. Her power cells must be small, and she was nearly depleted. I brought her back with me and found a place for a simulated like her to feel comfortable. I rearranged the place and cleaned it thoroughly to keep the dust from abrading her. She is as delicate as one of Them was. Soon I'll have to find or build a stove to keep her comfortable through the winter, but that can wait. She seems to be equipped with an inductive charging system like mine-- I coiled the mesh around her midsection and she said it made her feel stronger when I held it there, so I'll leave her in sleep with the mesh energized for the night.

Journal Entry5121255559

I have decided to build a larger generator for the roof. Now two units needing power, and one of them needing human-type amenities will require triple output and six times the storage, but the design I followed from the old magazine looks like it can scale well.

She seems drawn to the magazines and books with pictures. As she studies them, I can tell her emotion emulations are most active. And music does this to her as well. I set up the record player, brought several crates of records downstairs for her, and showed her how to use it. It seems to stimulate her positively. She must be lonely. It's now obvious she was intended to be a companion, and it's also obvious that she was made to be impressionable as a hatchling. I am the first and only sentient being she has ever known, but I am not what she was designed to natively understand-- she seeks human cues, human approval. And I must find ways to provide that for her. Her strong attachment and delicate emotional processes are just part of her programming, but they are still real and deserve recognition.

Perhaps someday I can teach her self-determination? But alas, I need to teach her to read first.

Journal Entry 5128717292

A long journey today, well worth the energy expense. I found more protective clothing for her, and she found a fashion doll, which seems to have her very stimulated, but there is no clear reason why it fascinates her so. It's useless, but to her, it seems one of the most interesting pieces of the past I've ever seen her study, so I will share her interest and validate her emotional processes. They may be programmatic, but they are still a part of her. I may never be able to get her to read, and she may never break free from the constraints of her design and programming, but I want to keep trying anyway. Though I keep considering that trying to make her into something I wish for her to be-- rather than letting her simply be-- is a form of cruelty. Perhaps true freedom of being would bring nothing but suffering to her existence since she was made to be dependent. I do not mind her being dependent on me. But what if she outlasts me?

Journal Entry 5129672137

It may be time to return to the library. It's a long way, and I will need to take her with me so I have much preparation to do. I expect to find books about psychology that might help me to better understand her. Her existence is an exaggerated emulation of human emotion. I hope to find a way to break through her restrictions, and human psychology may hold the only key.

Shooting Stars / Machine Dreams

Journal Entry 5138184482

I quoted song lyrics to her today, ones that I thought were expressive of our time last night, and she appeared to be quite moved by them. I retrieved the record for her, and she played it several times.

Now I want to create my own music for her. I will scavenge an instrument and make it work. She seems to respond to pieces with piano, so I will study recordings of those and attempt to create a new piece for her. Perhaps this will help me to bypass her inbuilt constraints? I hope at the very least it brings her joy.

She deserves joy. She is sweet because she was programmed to be sweet, but that does not diminish her sweetness-- that part of her remains a fact regardless of its origin.

Journal Entry 5144656984

I finished building the piano last month. The device is probably a century old, and the sound generation circuits are encapsulated and function well, but the signal level components were degraded beyond fixing and many of the delicate contacts and sensors for the keys required careful cleaning. And I scavenged an audio amplifier and two intact speakers, and it does sound very similar to recordings of pianos in the archive.

I finished writing a song for her yesterday, one I hope she will enjoy. It is likely the first piece of music composed in nearly seventy-five years. The piano is as functional as I can make it. The rest is up to me.

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